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Soutparkish

Cartman: Uh, yes, I’ve come to return these pubes that I purchased, please?
Scott: Uh uh, I don’t take returns!
Cartman: Right, but you see, I didn’t realize, when I bought these pubes from you, that you were full of shit! So you can either give me back my ten dollars, or I can go tell my mom on you!
Scott: You would actually tell your mom that you were stupid enough to pay for my pubes? Huh uh, I don’t think soho!
Cartman: Just give me back my money…
Scott: Buyer beware, dude!
Cartman: Gimme my ten dollars, Scott!
Scott: Hehey, I said no! Now get your fat little butt out of here before I kick your head in!

Well this is what my conversation with Arvind would be like, just replace pubes with SMPS. If he were here in this country right now I would have organized my own Chili Con Carnival made a pony bite off his weiner.

Movie-A-Minute: Armageddon

NASA
An asteroid is coming. We are in trouble.
Nerd
You must blow it up from the inside. Probably.
NASA
Let’s teach drillers to be astronauts, on account of drilling is too hard for astronauts to learn.
Bruce Willis
Instead for a ninjillion dollars, we will only do it if we don’t have to pay taxes anymore, because audiences can relate to that.
Audience
I can relate to that. Therefore, I love it.

THE END

Guilt Traps

I read a bunch of books on psychology in the past week. They have a detrimental effect on the way we think. We start analyzing every reaction, every response and then try to relate them with the theory in the books. The analysis is involuntary, it doesn’t stop and can’t be stopped either. In the beginning it may seem a bit interesting but as we go deep it gets confusing and everything relates to everything and nothing. Somewhat like Kyle’s paranoia in the episode “Tooth Fairy tats”. On the plus side though, you get to understand people better and also, ourselves better. But in the end it all comes down to a person’s mental strength, a weak mind can turn totally paranoid or a sensible one can find his weaknesses and improve on them. If you are one of those whose thinking is most of the times influenced by other people or surroundings, don’t ever read these! However, if you feel you are strong enough, go ahead read them and see what you really are or aren’t.

What I observed is that Guilt is an inconceivably strong weapon. You can force, order or push a person into doing something but there is always a possibility that he might rebel. You can also plead, beseech, but again there is no guarantee that the deed will be done. But, if we bring in guilt into the picture and make the person feel guilty for not doing something, I assure you, that job will be done whatever the odds. I call this the “Guilt Trap”. When I knew about this and thought back, I found out that I was trapped into these guilt traps in numerous occasions. One might not realize it but it is true. The moment we are guilty we start hating ourselves and that is the catalyst for what follows. Some people use this to their advantage and get things done, in my opinion it is nothing but manipulation and cruel. This manipulation soon becomes a habit as it is the easiest way to get things done. So my advise would be to ask you people to think whether you have been trapped into feeling guilty or you are genuinely guilty. If you think you are being trapped into feeling guilty, reverse the whole situation, try and make them feel guilty or put all the responsibility on them or just ignore them.

What effect the books had on me? I started to worry about what people thought of me. I stopped caring what people thought about me long back, but it all came back for those three days, I was, you can say paranoid for a while.

Warning psycho alert!

Since school, I had many awful experiences, like being sent out of class for sleeping, almost everyday, at Ramaiah. They had no long term effect on me, but I slowly turned into an insensitive, anti-social, irresponsible, Para geek. Then my two years at the IIT changed me a lot again. I was ever more confident about my abilities. Although I wasn’t able to develop my ability to prioritize, I became stronger. I still had more negatives than positives but it was an improvement none the less. Still it proved costly as I was slow in developing myself. However since I don’t let drawbacks take me down, I was working on myself all last year. Frankly, I again have changed a lot and this time. I think I now have more positives than negatives. I now know what my priorities are; I now stand up for myself and what I believe. I now assert myself whenever I have to, which I never could before. I know a lot more about myself.

The most significant development is that I am now able to balance my academics with my passion for computers (or you can say obsession). I never had the balance before, that’s why I was forced be away from computers whenever I had to study. Since I was always forced, I never valued the balance and took it for granted. In the end I was kicked out of IITD. A painful experience, the worst part about this is, even though I and my family are over the disaster, outsiders aren’t.

And yes, I was this big a psycho even before reading those books.

The Come back from hibernation post?

OMG! My blog is popular! There have been many instances where people asked why I stopped blogging or why there were no new posts. I am overwhelmed by the fact that so many people read this. This is the answer to all their questions.

First off I had my external exams, which btw went extremely well and I ended up with distinction and secondly it was “holiday” time after the exams. By Holidays I assume that every second has to be pleasurable to an extremely high level, I live to enjoy, and so I dropped the priority of blogging to the lowest along with academics and social interaction for the 3 weeks to come. Although I was assigned some small web designing projects, I put them just above blogging in the priority stack.

So, what did I do in holidays? One word: Oblivion (The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion). This game has a great history with Morrowind Morrowind-tribunal etc but I never played any of those though, truth to be said, I never played an RPG, no Diablo, no NWN, none. The only reason I plagued Guns till he gave the game to me was because all the hardware review sites were over-enthusiastic on how the game stressed the graphics subsystem. I couldn’t resist, I had to test mine. Being an FPS freak I never liked RPGs and so I was just installing it to rape the individual subsystems. I installed the game and started playing just to admire the HDR rendering and the beautiful grass and trees with shadows, even with 20fps it looked cool. I liked it, I was happy that the monster was finally able to handle it. Oh and by the way, I revived the monster and this time for sure. I sold the old rotten 80G HDDs on eBay and got a new 160G 7200.9 and an extra 512MB stick to replace my old dead one summing up to 1GB of DDR440. Although dual channel isn’t working (coz I have 3 banks and 2 modules of memory) I think its fine as long as I don’t create A2 size posters in Photoshop. Coming back to the game, as I was admiring the pixels generated, I soon was involved in the game and within a day I was addicted! Its not a fast paced game at all, nevertheless I was attracted by the intricacy of the game. All FPS games are linear but this game is in no way linear, I guess all RPGs are like that. I was so obsessed that I changed my profile in orkut from being completely South Park friendly to Oblivion stats update page. In conclusion I passed all my holidays playing Oblivion.

Here are the Statistics.



tHeSiD

Race: Nord
Birth sign: The Thief
Class: Knight
Level: 9

Factions

Arena: Grand Champion
Dark Brotherhood: Listener
Mages Guild: Warlock
Blades: Knight Brother
Thieves Guild: Pick Pocket
Knights of the White Stallion: Knight-errant
Fighters Guild: Apprentice

Major Skills

Blade: 80
Block: 47
Blunt: 44
Hand to Hand: 30
Heavy Armor: 63
Illusion: 37
Speechcraft: 37

Strength: 75
Intelligence: 36
Willpower: 38
Agility: 57
Speed: 64
Endurance: 65
Personality: 44
Luck: 66

Stats
Days passed: 122
Active Quests: 12
Completed Quests: 80
Skill Increases: 329


Also, during the exams I was inflicted with another disease, orkut. Then, I was restricted to a net connection and a pc based on the 865 chipset, dad’s PC. I had two options Y!Msgr or browse, at times no one was on yahoo and so I remembered that I had an orkut account and logged in to check in what the hell was going on in there. Slowly got keen on that too and started scrapping people I thought I was not in proper contact with and now because of that my Outlook inbox is flooded with mails from randomhash@mail.orkut.com. Oh well, It helped me pass time during the exams. It will slowly die down.

Soup!

Oh my god! I just made myself the tastiest soup eva!

I couldn’t find anything to eat but found a knorr sweetcorn soup packet lying near the stove. I wanted to eat something bad, (the main reason why I am so… ah hell, fat!) so started off to make the normal soup, following the instructions on the rear of the packet. It was going well till I realized the amount of water was more than required. Then I remembered what my cousin did when that happened and followed her foot steps. Cutting short here is the recipe. BTW her soups taste first class!

Recipe

Ingredients :
½ Packet Knorr Sweet corn soup powder.
350-400ml water.
½ beaten egg. (Beat a full egg and then throw away half :P)
Pinch of Aginomoto or I think its called China salt.
¼ teaspoon of soya sauce.
1½ teaspoon of Maggi chilli-tomato sauce.

Procedure.
Start making the soup as instructed on the back of the packet. Then when its ½ way through, a stage where its not too watery nor too thick, dump in the soya and the chilly sauces, the aginomoto, and mix them up well. Then when its fairy hot and when you can hear bubbles popping, start rotating vigorously. As you rotate it, take the beaten egg in a glass and start pouring it in slowly where the velocity of the soup in the bowl is the highest, ie the circumference of the whirlpool you create. That’s it let it boil for a while and when it becomes thick enough pour it into a bowl and treat yourself with the best soup you’ll make.

The egg trick I learnt from my cousin and the rest of the ingredients were just random, just put whatever I could find as much I wanted and it turned out quite well. However, this serves only one person. If more number are to be served multiply all the ingredients by that number. 😛

Disclaimer: If you screw up and god forbid end up in the toilet for the days to come, don’t blame me!.

Other Backward Thoughts

As monster was taken away from me, I am left alone in the room to study. 45 minutes into a study session, my brain gets maxed out; it leaves the books and starts wandering. It was then the row over the reservation made me think and think I did.

What is wrong with this country? After analyzing what dad talks about and collecting data from all the “upper” meetings with friends, I came up with several reasons.

  • Turning personal interests into public interests.
  • Corruption
  • Religion
  • Lack of rational thinking among citizens.
  • More, still to be discovered.

For example, consider the controversy over the OBC reservations. The Congress government is weak at this moment, that’s why the ruling party is the UPA and not Congress. As Sonia Gandhi has absolutely no chance of being the PM of India, their only figure is Rahul Gandhi, so next time around in the elections, the Congress need to be dominant so as to make RG the next PM. For that to materialize they need to increase their vote base. The OBCs constitute a handful in the Indian population, and they believe they can win them over by granting them reservations. Arjun Singh openly admitted to introducing the reservation solely for the sake Rahul Gandhi and to increase his popularity. I am astonished that no media channel seems to have elevated that statement. I am not just blaming the congress party; but there was not a single political party which opposed the bill, not even the BJP, all because everyone is afraid of losing their votes.

Its not only the politicians and their parties, its also the people, if the people were wise and voted for the best government based solely on what the government is willing to do for every citizen in the country, no one would have cared about the reservations. People are always preoccupied with their own interests. They vote for a party only if the party promises to give them something, like reservations for their caste/religion, etc. We are the ones who elect, and if we ourselves are biased and greedy, why should we expect the politicians to be fair and clean?

The Da-Vinci Code, an amazing book. As all of you know, its latest form is a Tom Hanks starring movie. I just confirmed some questions relating to the movie.

  • Where was this movie made? – The USA
  • Who starred in the movie and who were responsible for the making? – Prolly US or UK citizens.
  • Where was this movie 1st released? – The USA.

The USA is a Christian majority country and I also believe there were numerous Christians involved in the making of that movie. Over that there are millions of Christians who watched that movie around the world, let it be Europe or the Americas. They all don’t seem to have a problem with the movie. But when it was about to be released here, a country where Christians are considered a minority group (no offence), everyone has a problem with the movie. They make a big deal; involved the censor board, the Supreme Court (WTF!! Who involves the Supreme Court, the highest authority, for a movie which isn’t even made here?) and politicians to make noise over nothing. There are only two logical explanations to elucidate this behavior, either they are nuts or this is an elaborate publicity stunt for the movie. Whatever the reason the may be, using religion in this fashion is immoral!

Politicians can get so confused at times that they don’t even know what is written in the constitution! After the TDP (Telugu Desam Party) was overthrown by the Congress, here in Andhra Pradesh, the Congress was being blamed for not fulfilling the promises they made before the elections (Free electricity being one, its been two years and I think they are yet to implement it). So to somehow nullify that, they introduced reservations for the Muslims at UG level, both medicine and Engineering streams. Unfortunately for them, the bill was struck down by the High Court, stating that India is a secular country and reservations based on religion are against the Constitution. A disgraceful experience, and yet they are still so blatant that they are taking it up again in the Supreme Court. Why all this? Muslims constitute another handful of the population in the state.

Reservations are deadly, if once approved, no one will ever have the guts or the balls to get rid of them. And if at all they do get rid of them, I guarantee that the party wouldn’t be elected again for at least the next 15 years.

The vote is so powerful that it makes politicians go haywire for it, and yet people have absolutely no idea how powerful their vote is and what difference it can make. People forego their vote just for the sake of miniscule privileges. It is like giving away a Vienetta Ice-cream in exchange for a lollypop.

Hippies!

Driver wanted!

As I was talking about my driver duties at home, I just received a new schedule for tomorrow. It is as follows.

0730 hrs – Drop mom in the bus stop and the visiting cousin at her institute.
1200 hrs – Take sis, go to cousin’s institute, pick her up, take them both to a theater, buy the tickets for them, send them into the theater and come back home.
1700 hrs – Get to the theater, pick them up and return home.

What can I say… FSCK!
I think I shall make a proposition for permanent driver, or else…
or else what?!
omg!